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The Things People Say When You Are Having a Fourth Baby.

Posted on January 22, 2010 13 Comments

#1 “Oh you’re having another baby!”
Said with either total and utter shock and surprise or a slight tone of sympathy and confusion. I find it’s easier to go with the expected response so I usually just reply “Yes… I am totally insane” and leave it at that.

#2 “Are you sure it’s not twins again?”
Ah if I had a dollar for every time someone has said that in the last month or so…. This one is usually said as a joke, or with genuine fear and concern for us, and I know it’s actually a semi-reasonable question to ask but I just can’t help myself, I have to give people a crash course in twins.

“I know it is somewhat common to have a second set of fraternal twins because if you have the genetic tendency to ovulate twice in a cycle, then it is likely that you might do it on more than one occasion. But our girls are identical twins. They are a freak of nature. No one knows why their single fertilised egg decided to split a couple of days down the track and the chance of it happening again is really, really low. Like one in 70 000 low. I checked well before I decided to have more kids.”

#3 “When are you due?”
This a totally reasonable question to ask. People are curious about how pregnant I am (the already flabby belly makes it hard to guess) and they want to know what time of year, during what events etc the baby will be born. But I can’t help but give a vague answer. I’ve given birth twice, once 11 weeks from my due date and once 2 and half weeks from my due date… I have absolutely no reason to expect this baby will read the calendar and decide to come out any time around the magical 40 week mark.

Sometimes I want to answer “I have no idea, your guess is as good as mine” but that makes me sound like a crazy freak woman who has no idea how pregnant she is. So generally I give a vague ‘sometime around the end of June or the beginning of July’ answer, because really I have no darn clue!

Some days I am very thankful for my flabby belly and my low lying baby because I don’t look pregnant so I only have to field these questions from friends and family (who already know I am insane) rather than random strangers on the street… yet.

Did you get any recurring comments or questions while pregnant? Come up with any snappy responses?

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Filed Under: Farm Tales, Pickle-me-kate Tagged With: baby4, family

Read the comments or scroll down to add your own:

  1. pixie says

    yup………pregnancy and twins just seem to bring out the stupidity in people……

    hugs

    Reply
  2. Sharon says

    Oh arent some of them great! I got “So I bet you are hoping its a boy this time!” among others of course.

    Reply
  3. Sharon says

    Oh and I forgot to add….I used to day the insane comment (still do for other reasons) and now Im actually starting to believe that I could be ;) Be careful with that one….lol!

    Reply
  4. Katy says

    We’re looking at having #4 now, and I’m not looking forward to peoples reactions :( :( Really sad.

    When you get together, people ask when you’re going to get engaged?
    Then it’s when are you going to get married?
    Then it’s when are you going to have kids?
    Then you have the first child, and it’s “when are you going to have another one?”
    You have #2 (and #3!), and then people think you’re nuts for considering any more than that.

    Everyone thinks they’re entitled to an opinion!!

    Reply
  5. tiff says

    Oh Kate, where do I start?

    Stranger:Is it twins again?
    Me: yes
    Stranger: OMG poor you, how ever will you cope?

    Then there is the whole TV line (one of my pet peeves)

    Reply
  6. Alison says

    Daddy Kewl was killed when I was a few weeks pregnant with Miss V, so not yet showing. I got some ridiculous comments when the pregnancy became obvious!
    Like – “Did you do that thing where they take sperm from the body after he died?”
    And – “Are you sad that he’ll never meet the baby?”
    And – “Do you want more?”

    Funny now. But still no less ridiculous! lol

    Reply
  7. Andrew says

    we met a lady who had 2 sets of twins (no idea if they were identical or) 11 months apart, 4 kids under a year old (ouch)..

    Reply
  8. Jayne says

    Hmm…what’s wrong with a simple ‘congratulations!’ I wonder?

    Reply
  9. Secret Mom Thoughts says

    The rudest thing I was asked was if I was having twins. When I answered no, the co-worker actually said “Are you sure?’

    Reply
  10. Lightening says

    Congratulations!

    I would love to have twins. Or a 4th child. Farmboy isn’t so keen though.

    Hope everything goes well with the pregnancy. :)

    Reply
  11. Erin says

    I keep getting told i’m “not very big for twins” mind you, i’m 29 weeks and bigger than two girlfriends who just gave birth full term!

    I do actually worry already if i try for more kids down the track. These ones are identical but i have loads of fraternal twins in my family too!

    Reply
  12. PlanningQueen says

    As with Tiff, we still get a lot of the “No TV” thing as well. I remember many people being surprised that we “kept going” after our daughter was born – we had some of each why would we want any more???

    Reply
  13. Christie says

    I used to find it hard to respond to, “You must be so excited!?!” Actually, I was scared, nervous and doubtful, anything but excited, for about the first 20 weeks

    Reply

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