Can I cry for a minute about wee?
I just want to take a little moment and channel Zoe for a moment… this is the part where I stamp my foot, pout and scream ‘it’s not fair!’ several times….
It’s not fair! It’s not fair! It’s not fair!!!!
I have three children in nappies and it’s not bloody fair!
Ok so technically the girls are only in nappies at night, but they are still in nappies. And when I hear of another friend’s child ready to toilet learn, or friends having success with elimination communication or a three year old who is night trained … well I just wanna cry.
I wanna cry for all the money we spend on pull-ups that don’t even contain all the wee.
I wanna cry for all the pyjamas I wash, not to mention the sheets.
I wanna cry for the times when the girls stand out as different when putting on their nappies.
I wanna cry for me and for my girl’s.
I’m not blaming the girls for not being night trained.. it’s not their fault, it’s not my fault… it’s not anyone’s fault. It just is.
They just aren’t ready…. physically they can’t manage it. They can’t hold on to that much wee for that long and they can’t wake themselves up to wee. It’s not because they don’t want to, or because they are lazy… it’s because they can’t.
They were older than average when they finally got the hang of using the toilet during the day and it took a long, long, long time and a LOT of puddles on the floor before it all clicked. So really I am not surprised that they are still not night trained at five and half years old. Everything points to the fact that in this area (and others) they are just taking longer to mature.
Before you tell me the secret to getting the girls out of nappies… don’t.
I’ve read up on this, I even studied it at uni and I know no matter how many bribes I give or promises I make, it isn’t going to change things. Waking them up in the night and taking them to the toilet also isn’t going to change anything. I know this because we’ve tried…. yes, even the bribe thing and I am so anti bribes and reward charts.
I’m not looking for answers…. I just need to cry for a little ok…. anyone got a free shoulder?
Oh Kate, I feel for you. It has been such a long , hard row with the girls and you have been such a wonderful patient mother. Shed a tear girl then continue on as you have. It will all come together in time.
Sometimes we do need to just talk about how we feel and not have someone try to solve our problems.
And I am with Grandma Jill, sounds like you are a wonderful and patient mum.
You can cry on my shoulder!, and I can be empathetic too! I’ve been buying nappies continuously for over 10 years! Yesterday we were lucky enough to get 3 wet beds, bonus!…. it was our lucky day! I’m dreading for when my 8 year old goes on school camp. I’m hoping and praying he won’t wet his bed. There are so many aspects of this post that I can relate to! I guess the greatest comfort is that they won’t be wetting when they’re 18! :-)
(hugs) Nothing in the way of advice but you know you are not alone.
I agree with Nicole – just being able to talk and vent helps get if off your chest.
This , too will pass. In their time.
Oh my god – I could have written this. Wasting money on pull ups and the bed is wet anyway. The nurse told me last week that it is not a problem until they are 8, but I hope it’s not that long. And one of them wets themselves once during the day – not often at home, but she will at school and I so feel for her – she just can’t get there in time. Tantrum away – I understand.
Hugs Kate. Vent away, its good for you. Hopefully it seems a little better now that you have got it off your chest. And even as an adult, we are entitled to a tantrum if that is what it takes for those around us to really listen to us, not just hear the words that we say.
I have a couple of suggestions, but won’t post them here. Email me if you want to know more.
Here’s my shoulder. Feel free to place head NOW!
hugs
My eldest was slow to day train and even slower to night train so I feel your pain.
Definitely a shoulder or two free here. That’s what we’re here for!
I think you’re doing an amazing job and maybe this is just one of things that will work itself on its own. Not much comfort for you and all the washing and expensive pull-ups, I know. Look at how wonderful and happy and full of life and fun your girls are…the rest will sort itself out. ((hugs))
Actually, this post gave me a sigh of relief. I’m in the midst of potty training and after cleaning up nine puddles today I felt like a big, fat failure of a mom. Then I read this post and realized that you had to deal with puddles too. And somehow, this made it better for me. So thank you.
Two great big mama shoulders right here whenever you need them!
x
Well all I can say is I HEAR YOUR PAIN!!!!!
My darling son is 6 in July & has NO IDEA when it comes to night training.
We too hate the nappy factor, but pull ups are pathetic & just lead to trauma for both mother & child (me = washing, him = devastated that he has wet himself overnight). So we stick to nappies. We have tried just about everything ever mentioned with no success. They say it just clicks, but I am not so sure :)
My son was 4 weeks prem & a bit slower in some things, but this is just plain frustrating.
You are not alone, but CRY away…..I have those days too!!
Sandi :)
I can’t related on a toilet training level, but I do understand the not wanting to hear of anything – younger – kid doing something yours isn’t able to yet.
Bloody pull ups! I can’t believe they don’t work properly, they’re too bloody expensive! Do you think your girls would wear some kind of cloth pull up nappy/pant? Might save you some money and time – just thinking, feel free to ignore me.
It’ll happen. Believe me! When you’re feeling down about it, just remember that Erik was in day nappies until he was 4 years and 7 months, and then in night nappies (for which he saved ALL his poos, didn’t do even ONE in the loo) until he was 6 years and 7 months…
Luey was in day and night nappies until he was 4 years and 7 months…
Bryn is currently 3 years and 9 months and guess what – STILL in day and night nappies (and I was ECing him for poos between 6 months and 12 months of age – it made NO difference)…
And well, Ari is in nappies, and unless there is some kind of miracle, he’ll probably still be in nappies in four years time…
I do feel your pain!
((((( Hug))))))
I know how it feels. I’ve got one who still wets the bed and he’s nearly 8. I am also dreading the camps etc and other sleepovers.
I’m the same. But two kids in Nappies. I finally had my oldest out of nappies – for a few weeks. I felt accomplished and happy and thought “woo hoo, it’s done” – but for 3 days straight we have had accidents accidents accidents – and probably only going potty once a day now. I have no idea why she regressed… but I want to cry too!!! I feel sooo the same. Just know you are not alone. I TOO have read everything and am tired of people saying “oh, I had mine trained by the time they were 3 weeks old (okay – so that’s an exaggeration but you know what I mean). So feel free to cry – is it okay to cry with you?
{hug} Kate, have a cry babe, heaven knows I have had this same frustrated tantrum myself a few times.
FWIW though, pullups suck and they cost so much. I have found far more success and dry sheets with the largest sized pull-on nappies from Huggies. She is over the weight range but they still fit her tall skinny body just fine.