I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for all the times I have not said something I should have.
For when I have not said how proud I am, how happy I am, how awesome you are, or how sad I am.
I’m sorry for all the times I have said too much.
For when I have babbled to hide my fear, or embarrassment, for when I have not stopped to listen, for when I have assumed or expected.
I’m sorry for thinking I should be someone I am not.
For wanting to be skinnier, smarter, more creative, a better cook, a perfect mother.
I’m sorry for not looking after myself.
For not getting enough sleep, and for not spending enough time filling my own cup so that I can fill yours.
I’m sorry for all the ‘shoulds’ and ‘could haves’.
For wasting time worrying about things that are over and done with, or that haven’t happened yet.
I’m sorry for not loving myself.
For spending time worrying about the way I look, or what others think about me, and for never being in the photo.
I’m sorry for not forgiving myself.
For not letting go of mistakes, for not giving myself grace.
I’m sorry, my beautiful children, for the times when I haven’t said sorry, to you and to myself.
Because making mistakes is no big deal, but learning from them is important.
Oh, Kate, you made me teary. This is beautiful and heartfelt and really captures how excruciating it can be sometimes to be a mom.
Ooh Kate! I am the same Jeanette, reading this made me a tear up too! I am sure as mums we can all relate to this. Beautiful strong words.
You took the words right out of my heart. Thank you for a beautiful reminder.
I’m so glad it resonated with you…. I was wondering if it was perhaps only me that was feeling like I was letting kids down by putting myself last :)
I’m printing this so I can read it again. Thank you.
thank you for taking the time to comment… it can so often feel like we are alone on this parenting journey, until someone else takes the time to say ‘yep… I know.’
A friend of mine told me about your blog because she thought I would like it, and I don’t like it… I LOVE it! Especially this apology, I think this way so many times. Thank you, you may just be my “little pick me up oasis”!
Thank you for saying so succinctly, everything I want to say….. x