Say What You See

Say what you see.”

Those four words are powerful.
They are powerful for us as parents, and powerful for our kids.

When your child is frustrated, upset, loosing it, being rough, not thinking…
Say what you see.

“You are crying. You don’t want to pack up”
“You yelled at your brother, you seem really mad.”
“You both want to use that right now.”
“You are really anxious about doing that.”

Say what you see to set the tone.
Say what you see as a ‘positive first response‘
Say what you see as a way to help you yell less.
Say what you see as a way to keep calm, and gain some time to think before you react.
Say what you see to focus on your child in that moment, not on your own stress, frustration or feelings.
Say what you see to help you recognise the need your child is trying to express.

Say what you see to show your child you are listening.
Say what you see to show your child you care about how they are feeling.
Say what you see to show your child you want to understand.
Say what you see to show your child they are important.
Say what you see to show your child that whatever they are feeling is ok.
Say what you see to acknowledge your child’s feelings so they can begin to move past them.
Say what you see to give your child a chance to explain.

Say what you see when you don’t know what else to do.

Say what your see when your kids are feeling proud, happy, kind or positive too.

Say what you see to connect with your kids, regardless of the situation.

It seems so simple… but sometimes it feels so hard.

Just say what you see.

 

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I first came across this simple concept at Language of Listening.
It is the title of a great book by Sandra R Blackard and if you’d like to know more you can read the entire book, online, for free, here, I highly recommend it.

If you need a little reminder of this simple parenting tool, you can download the image above as a free printable A4 poster here.

The printable poster simple says ‘say what you see’ without any additional text, and it is an A4 sized pdf file. If you are printing on US ‘letter sized’ paper be sure to select ‘fit’ or ‘shrink to fit’ from your printer options.
Please remember that the free printables at picklebums.com are for personal use only, you may not sell, share, or link directly to these files.