“Because I said so”
“You get what you get and you don’t throw a fit”
“Suck it up princess”
“If you don’t eat it I’ll serve it up for breakfast”
Would we say it to our best friends?
Would we say it to our boss?
Would we say it to our grandmothers?
Would we like someone to say it to us?
Then why do we say it to our children?
I know kids ask the same thing over and over again.
I know we have to say the same thing elevnty billion times and they still don’t remember
I know parenting can be frustrating and tiring and overwhelming.
I know it’s easy to just trot out one of these catchy little sayings, I know, because I’ve said them all, and regretted it.
If we want our children to listen, if we want them to speak kindly, if we want them to be respectful and caring, then we need to be all these things first, over and over, even when we don’t want to.
It’s not always easy to break a habit, or to find better words in the heat of the moment, but lets start by simply choosing not to say these kinds of disrespectful, mean, or sarcastic things to our kids.
If you are looking for ideas to help you respond more positively or find better words these articles might help:
Positive First Response – a little trick I have up my sleeve to at least get me started in the right direction when it comes to some recurring situations that push my buttons.
Pre-Plan Your Parenting – do a little preventative pre-planning and putting into place some positive strategies before things go to hell in a hand basket.
Change Your Tone – moving from negative to positive language with kids.
I don’t say any of these to my kids. I hated them being said to me and consciously made the decision when I became a parent I would treat my children how I want to be treated because I wanted to raise confident, strong, compassionate adults.
Great post!