Hands Off The Bump!

I know my stomach sticks out a long way at the moment.
I know it is round and hard like a watermelon just waiting to be squeezed.
I know you think you are ‘connecting with the baby’ somehow.

But seriously….. STOP TOUCHING ME!!!!!

I don’t care if you are related to me by birth or marriage.
I don’t care if you think you are being ‘funny’ because you already know how much I hate it.
I don’t care if you are some random grubby, fingered stranger at the supermarket.

HANDS OFF MY BUMP, YOU FREAK!

It is still part of me.
It is still my stomach.
It is still part of my personal space.

STOP TOUCHING MY BELLY.

If I manage to step back when you go for the grope, take the hint and stop there.
If I manage to intercept your hand and tell you politely that I don’t like it, don’t be offended.
If I hang a little sign on my stomach that says ‘don’t touch’, please read it!

KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF

I will happily answer your stupid questions.
I will happily tell you that I have no idea exactly when this baby will arrive.
I will happily agree that I must be insane to be having a fourth child.

JUST DON”T TOUCH MY STOMACH OK!