I was up at 3am last night – er, this morning I mean. Sitting up in the cold trying to rock the small boy to sleep I decided to flick on the TV to distract us both and what do you know, the telly was talking to me. Yes, to ME!
First it told me how my weird problem (number 3) was not so weird after all (which I already knew since so many of you commented that I was not alone) and not only that but if I bought ‘proactve solution’ it would fix it! No more pimples – just wrinkles. For only two easy payments of $29.99. Plus! If I order online I will get this free gift, and this one and that one too! Now how did the TV know that I have a huge pimple on the end my nose right now and that I was in desperate need of a ‘life long solution’ to my problem??
After the telly had convinced me to part with my hard earned cash to beat my zits, as I sat there with the small but heavy child in my arms with my back crying out for some relief, then it told me that if I bought Gunner Smith’s Core Strength Work Out that it would solve my other pressing problem. My sore back and total lack of stomach muscles and core strength (cause you know being pregnant for 42 weeks can do that to a girl) would be fixed for only $49.99 – and they’d throw in the fitball and a pump totally free! How generous!
Just as I was sitting there wondering if the small child would go to sleep quicker on my lap in front of the computer while I ordered these wonder products the telly spoke to me again. Yes, straight to me. It told me to look at my floors, and I did and I saw fluff and dust and a few crumbs that I had missed when I swept with my ‘old fashioned broom’ earlier in the night ‘especially in those hard to reach corners and under furniture’. How did the telly know that my floors were in desperate need of help? How did it know that not only did I need zit cream, and a work out video but that I also need a swivel sweeper??
By that stage it was after 4am, the small child had finally dozed off. I was too freaked out that the telly had spoken directly to me to go and order any of the things it told me to so we just went back to bed. Interestingly in the stark light of day I am not sure these products seem so good any more. Can anyone recommend them? Anyone that is, who isn’t a B grade celebrity looking for some extra cash?
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Oh dear, don’t they usually have evangelists on TV at that hour?
Susan Kishner says
Nice writing style. I will come back to read more posts from you.
*snigger* I remember those days of middle of the night ads that have to advertise in the middle of the night because only sleep-deprived mothers would really believe them. :) Oh yeah, I did order something once. And it was good. They’re not all bad. But the “be in the next 50 callers” lines are a classic “quick, hurry up and order before you change your mind” type thing. I nearly fell for a similar thing at a show I attended recently. :(
Did they come with a free set of steak knives too?
Sounds like you are with me on the tiredness. Hope you don’t have to sit through many more late night ads…
My husband bought a vacuum cleaner off a late night telly ad. Actually he bought two for the price of one and they are both crap. I don’t know these products you menitoned, but I reckon that if they were realy that good we would have all heard of them before!!!
brightonwoman/Mommy Bee says
One of my friends has a ‘magic bullet’ blender and loves it…I have been tempted to get the ‘core rhythms workout’ DVD (exercising with latin dance moves) but that’s because I was already a ballroom/latin dancer, I *know* it works, and it would just be nice to have a movie to do it along with. LOL!
Alison (3xkewl) says
I can only recommend NOT buying them. lol.
I hope you get some sanity restoring sleep tonight!
Lol Another who has been tempted into believing though when I looked at the ingredients I realised how it wouldn’t actually help my skin so went to the health food shop instead and came home armed with samples ;)
Oh dear, you MUST have been tired.
Don’t buy them. Trust me on that one. :)
I do know someone who bought the Gunner core strength dvd’s (or was it Billy whatshisfaces) and swears by them, but we all know that stuff is shyte and if we wait long enough we’ll get it at Clints for a third of the price. ;)
Hope you get some more sleep hon.
Hmmmm, better to jump on the puter me thinks! LOL
Ah – so by 4am all the hussies offering to sweet talk for only $8 per text have tucked themselves in, have they?
LOL – love your post. The power of advertising. If only there were ads that told us that perfect skin is overrated and that our bodies are perfect just the way they are and that a little dust is good for us and in fact an overly clean house really isn’t healthy. But what could they sell to us if everything was perfect just the way it is?